Don't be confused my dear, this is you and only you, and you have nothing to worry about. Teh soul searching is kind of a little side project I'm doing within my own mind, it's nothing to be concerned with, it'll work out just fine in the end, trust me. Breath in what others say and listen to what they do and from that I will learn and cherish within myself, a perfection and hale love, that is true and fathomable. There it is, that is how it will be, incredible, immaculate, and you will love me more for it.

.....hiding one's feeling's isn't quite what I had in mind, it's more of a distracting from the kinds of feeling that aren't necessarily healthy, I'm sure you know what it is that I'm talking about, if not, ask an I'll tell you. I've made too many mistakes comcerning love and the ideas of love and everything having to do with infatuation and that other mess, so I'm taking this opportunity to finally live and learn, I'm not gonna assume what it is by definition, or what is supposed to happen therein, I'm simply going to let it do whatever it's supposed to do, whatever that might be. Too many times have I taken the liberty of defining for myself (and others) what is "supposed" to happen, this time it wil be alot different, I go into this realizing that fairy tale fantasy love is just that, fairy-tale; I won't be able to sit back and it all fall into place, I must direct it, guide it, and possibly create it in itself (if you can imagine that) But for now, I'll call it love, or at least, I'm in love.

Sorry sweetie, I missed you the last couple of days, but not to worry I'm back on earth. recently I venture to the other side of town to relate to my hombre and close business partner to settle out some interesting and overwhelmingly unneccesary topics, but that's okay. I'm not mad you, I agree that it's wrong, but I don't think that it was your place. Love, what a wonderful topic to have to understand, I personally have given up on understanding it and I try to just go with the flow...you know? Speacking of love, I haven't had the oppurtunity to spend any time with my sweetheart and I'm really really jones'in' but patience is a virtue, not one that I seem to flourish in (to say the least) so maybe I should work on that one. Today I was sitting in the living room watching TV (by the way, Tomb Raider : The Cradle Of Life, is the stupidest fucking movie in the entire world) and all I could think about was Britt, I'm still tryin to decipher exactly what this one is, time can only tell, so we .......Go with the flow...you know? Ya mon, iz gooood!!!


Song Of The Month (November) - Deathcab for Cutie - We Looked Like Giants (Kickass Song (Kickass CD))